minebermejo

may 14 2009

2009-05-15T21:37:00.000-07:00

it was past 3am in the morning i thought i was dreaming but i wasn't..my cp was ringing..and wen i looked at the number it wasn't in my fonbook... i answered the fon.. i don't recognize the voice until he said it was HIM... i was so surprise curiosity filled all over me.. i asked him why he called..he was crying and i know he was drunk.. he said he miss me..the hell with him...he beg for me to call him he said it while sobbing...i took pity or maybe kagagahan i called him...he was crying..i want to scream at him,tell him how he hurt me and now he will bother me because he had no one to turn to?(but i know i will just waste my energy so i dont) no one to understand him during his downtime? i don't know but i dont feel the kilig factor anymore..maybe jp is correct it's only in my mind n lg....
hard to write the total scenario...basta i'm happy that his mesirable right now...i know its a bad thought but i cant help it...(smile!)

PUERTO GALERA...

2009-04-19T04:23:00.000-07:00

Just got home from puerto galera... gosh it was so crowded..lots of people there...
we arrived at puerto past 5pm yesterday..we really had fun during the travel..nes and ervs were so noisy...hahahha
we're quite disappointed with the house that we rented..it was beautiful nice clean and airconditioned but it's 2-3 mins walk from the beach...but the facilities were good..we had enough space and rooms for all of us...
i ate kebab chicken and i really miss it..i ate 2 cup of rice..hehehhe

i bought a cover up dress for my two piece--i don't know the term of that..my officemates told me that i'm so skinny..which i'm aware of..that's why i'm eating anything now as nuch as possible..

boss robert had this obssession of taking up stolen shots..duhh... but i got even..hehehe i also had a stolen shot of him..mwehehhehehe

we had fun!!!
i enjoy snorkling...i know how to use the snorkle n..hahahah!!!

there was so many fish.. i saw a school of fish swimming under us..but the scary part was the sea urchins..loys of them!!! venus got panicked when we were tooo close at sea urchins..scary...but anyway i enjoy...i dont regret paying 3oo hundres pesos..worth it nmn...

but it was like bitin.. i want to stay there more..haaayyyy..next time..
ciao!! i'm going to sleep now... i will just continue uploading the pics tomorrow..

PANDORA'S BOX

2009-04-11T19:50:00.001-07:00

so many things happened in the past few days..
so many revelations--some i couldn't bear...
so many lies were told..
so many pretentions and cover ups were done...
so many plans were made
so many painful words i heard...

but i know in the end i will get through with it..
but i'll make sure--and that's for sure--
i'll get even...
you will pay for what u did....
not now..soon....

i hope they will understand...

2009-03-19T22:06:00.000-07:00

i'm still in pain right now.. i want to move on but the pain still lingers on me...
i cant accept the fact that we broke up because of 3rd party.. it hurts...

i hope i can move on soon..
i hope my friends will still there to understand me everytime i was like a stereotype talking about it again and again.. that's the only way i can let out my emotions and let out the pain i'm feeling inside...

i dunno where he is right now.. he didn't even texted our friends...

i'm still hoping but i hope my heart will stop beating for him....i hope soon the pain will end..and i will forget him and the pain he caused me..
but i still want to see him suffer..regret of what he'd done to me...

o i wish it's April already..cant wait for April to come..

ngaa?

2009-03-14T18:20:00.000-07:00

ngaa nhimo m ni sakon mn? ngaa nd ka mg tubang sakon? mlakat ka n..ngaa nd m gusto mg storya sakon?
ngaa nd m msabat mga pamngkot ko? kg gna takpan ka p ka mga frends ta-mga frends m n lg gali?
ngaa ntabo n saton mn? palangga ta gd ka? diin ko ng kulang? ngaa nd m gd ko p tagaan chance p haw? kasakit gd ka dn himo m sakon.
ngaa n init ka gd? ngaa kulang n lg dw isumpa m n ko? ikaw ang ng baya sakon tpos ikaw p ang g arte nga dw ikaw ang dihado...ikaw ang n ngita iban..pero ngaa gn istorbo m p ko? ngaa gn tagaan m p o false hope? ngaa? nd ka gd gusto nga mk move on ko?
anu gd kadako sala ko cmu? anu gd kadaku?

just another day..

2009-03-08T23:07:00.000-07:00

have a shift later..but not yet sleepy...
there are so many things running in my mind...
i'm still hurting inside... i'm trying to move on...
it's a long process i think...
we eaxchaned hurtful texts last sunday..
and i regret texting him..
it really hurt me...
i wish my friend we be here soon..
so i can say PAY BACK TIME....

i still have to wait for a month now..then i hope it will be successful..

u ruined me.. i will ruin you...
i really, really hate you....

getting into it..

2009-03-06T21:47:00.000-08:00

on the floor right now, we have march madness..the more positive esca ur team got the more points u can have to win the game..
i got one today..i didn't fish for it,just like most did... so i can really say my positive esca is pure..mwehehheehe

2 days now that i didn't feel the pain much---being heart broken...
i can eat now...not that soooo depress anymore...but i really hate him..
i swear time will come you willpay....
you will regret what you did to me.....
i really really hate you that i don't care anymore whatever happens to you...

***subong ok lg n kay my mga raket ka p...raket are not permanent..panu pg n dula n n? tikalon n cmu...dw n pkita m gd sakon subong kg anu knugon nga wala n t..kag ikaw p ang bitter mg hambal to think nga ikaw ng baya sakon..tikalon ka n gd y..pwes ang tinikal m my katapusan kag ako na ang mtapos!
subong p ngalipay kamu...ubusa nu ang 1 k bulan nu p ngalipay..april comes tan-awon ta kg k pangalipay p kamu...pare-pareho gd kmu mga butigon...

see-saw...

2009-02-25T01:01:00.000-08:00

Monday shift...lunch break ..
i checked my cp and was surprised that i got a missed call..
i checked the number...
it was his....!
my heart was thumping so hard..
i dunno...
excitement..
hope...?
i dunno...
i had the urge to txt him.but i control myself not to.if he wont txbk then i will be dissapointed again...
and i dont want to be dissapointed becoz of him.
i am trying to move and he kept doing this...
playing see-saw in my head....
why he was trying to call me?
for what?
he said i have to leave him alone(many times)...
he didn't feel anything for me anymore...
but why he was doing this..?
i hate him!!
i arrived home that day checking my other cp and found out that i have 4 missed call and it wa his number..!!
why are you doing this..?
you hurt me so much that i was about to give up...
you dump me!
so let me go now!
bother me no more!
i really really hate you...
i know it's not a good thing to say but i regret i loved you that much.....
you're not deserving..
you're not worth keeping for...
you don't know how to value the goodthings..
you only look on the negative sides...
i hate you...!

an eye opener..

2009-02-17T20:19:00.000-08:00

got a call today from one of our CH.. she inspired me to move forward..she brought tears in my eyes and made me realize it's not the end of the world if a relationship failed..
she thought me how to move on and try to let go..
he's a mother of two..husband left him because of other woman and hubby is on drugs..she said it pains her much..at first she tried to hate him much because of what he did..but then she realized that hate will just lead her nowhere..she tried to forgive she said but she can't forget..but she havee to move on and forgive and forget for her 2 daughters.. she told me it's not the end of the world.. God is on her side to lead her to a new path of life...what i really like when she sais.." i'm a beatiful woman inside out and God knows and sees it.he will help me move on and enjoy life.God took his husband away from him because He knows that his not good for him..." now i know why God let me experience this what i'm in right now..his not the right person for me..not the right one to share my dreams with... I'm proud to say "I'M BEAUTIFUL INSIDE OUT AND GOD KNOWS IT"
it's his loss not mine...thank you very much your such an inspiration miss_____... you made me realize how i wasted my time over nothing....

3 more days..

2009-02-16T21:43:00.000-08:00

3 more days and my vengeance will start... as i've said no one messes up with me.. i'll strike back and avenge... i can forgive but i won't forget..

here we go again...

2009-02-11T20:29:00.000-08:00

i'm home..emptiness is all over me..it's back again...
ferenand said i don't look like i'm heartbroken..that when he looked at me it's like i'm just lying..well, then maybe i'm a good actress..i can hide the pain that lingers on me...

i wish i can turn back time.... i wish i never fall in love...
i wish.. i wish... more wishes that i know no answers and never will come true...

what now..???

2009-02-09T20:39:00.000-08:00

he came yesterday...actually he called me the other day..my heart was jumping...with joy or excitement... i dunno... but i'm glad he came.. we talked we laugh we shared something.. we kissed... but i dunno..i'm puzzled... i saw a pic on his fone.. i dunno if he intentionally showed it up to me... he said that's not his girl.. i dunno.. but i felt a pang of pain..? i have to move on i have to... i'm in the process but seing him again..made me go back to zero....hayyyyy i still love him i guess.. or is it just a thought? i dunno... i felt the pain inside me again... although not that painful.. but it's still here.... part of me wanting him back..i think not only part of me but most of me.. i dunno what's running inside his thoughts.. i can't read it.. i hope i can.. so i wont be like this... hanging in a thin air...

5 YEARS AND 9 MONTHS..

2009-02-05T21:42:00.000-08:00

020409.... it's over....it's final... we're done... a friend of mine...

5:54am

2009-01-31T13:47:00.000-08:00

i'm awake..yes,too early.. can't sleep though.... ahhh... when will it last...??? i'm waiting...waiting.. waiting...
i feel like i'm dying inside... don't know what to do to let go of this pain....
sakit....
God, i feel like crying again...
i wantto go to his place pay a visit but what if he would tel " puli n 2 pahuway t anay.."
rejection..
i'm stupid.. stupid.. stupid...
how did i let myself into this mess? i want to go out...
there's some part of me that anger lives... i even made a drastic plan to get even..
no one messess up with me.... i will strike back.. remember that...

IT'S 2 WEEKS NOW..

2009-01-30T20:06:00.000-08:00

yet, no response no msgs nothing..maybe this is it.. this is the end..
it hurts...

ONE MORE DAY..

2009-01-28T21:16:00.000-08:00

will he come..? will he appear? i don't know... maybe i won't expect anymore so that it won't hurt that bad..( i know it's a lie,coz deep inside me still expects)
yesterday the pain was there..wanted to cry but i can't.. i don't want other people to notice what i feel.. have to pretend that everything is fine... i was taking calls but my mind wasn't there...haaayyy
when will it end..? i shopped today.. para malingaw... good thing i t helps..
now i'm home.. not feeling that pain again..trying hard not to think about it...trying to think something else..
if he will not come then it's time to move on....
maybe time will come my heart will stop beating for him.. i don't know when.. i don't know where to start.. but i know i have to face reality... i lost the person i really love and want to share my life with... i don't want to find replacement just to fill in the whole...
maybe... maybe... maybe.. i can move on..maybe...

IT'S HERE AGAIN..

2009-01-25T20:05:00.001-08:00

it's really a process... but i hope it will process soon.. is there any timeframe for it? like express for 2-3 business days? yesterday i felt the pain again... it's still there and it's still here...
text and no reply... no reply...
it hurts.. i feel empty again.. want to cry but i shouldn't... trying hard to cover the pain with laughs and pretention.. but everytime i came home... it's still there..
God it feels like hell!!!

i hate lovesongs....

2009-01-24T22:00:00.001-08:00

hate hearing it right now.. it brings back painful memories.. haaayyyy....

move on move on move on....

MOVING ON...

2009-01-23T22:24:00.000-08:00

friends are GoD'S GIFT--yes, its true.. i found them and very thankful..
with that i am in right now.. i'm so thankful that i have friends who can lift up my spirit..
it's not easy to move on.. it's a process.. i know.. i'm starting to be there.. i can talk now without breaking into tears... tnx cherie and japee... ur one of my good friends that are heaven sent..the one that i can keep and i can treasure...
maybe bit by bit i can move on... as what they said.. focusing too much on your future only keeps you from appreciating on where you are right now...
then i have to start appreciating what i have right now and stop dwelling on pain and rejection..
everything has a reason why it happened.. maybe there's a reason why this happened...
i'll just wait what will be in store for me.. i'm not gonna rush... i'll be patient...

PREPARING..

2009-01-22T22:07:00.000-08:00

as days passed by i have this mixed emotions inside me..fear..excitement...hopes...but most of it FEARS..... fear of losing someone i really care.. someone i created my dreams..someone i want to build my future.... someone i want to grow old with...
i was just thankful that tin2 and jed were there to uplift my spirit... even just a little bit my depression lessen... but i'm still afraid for two weeks to pass.. what if it's the end..what if i can't take it back anymore? what if... what if...?

it feels like i'm no longer here..

2009-01-20T02:12:00.000-08:00

i lost interest in all the things around me now. i'm so lost.so alone so empty. why PRIDE was created? i hate it...
more negatives thoughts came in my mind today.. i'm hopeless.. i can't take it anymore.. i want to quit.. ahhh!!!! sakit sakit ga!ngaa nimo m n sakon g pakanubo n ko..grabe.. nd m gd japon m haboy pride m..ngaa? s isa lg k pitik m dula lg dason? nd ko gusto madula ka... m dulaan gd ko ginhawa kg amu n..nd ko gd masarangan...
bahala n..kung bayaan m ko..bahala n kung anumsulod s pinsar ko.bahala n..

TWO WEEKS? AND THEN WHAT?

2009-01-17T13:37:00.000-08:00

After you go, I can catch on my reading
After you go, I have lot more time sleeping
And when you go, it looks like thing's gonna be lot easier

Life would be at ease you know
I really should be glad.
But I'm bluer than blue
Sadder than sad
You're the only life this empty room has ever had
Life without you is gonna be
Bluer than blue..
After you go, I have a lot more room in my closet
After you go, I can stay out long if I feel like
And when you go, I can run through half screaming
And no one can ever hear me
I really should be glad
I don't have to miss no tv show
I can start my whole life over
Change the numbers on my telephone
but the night will sure be colder.

The pain is excruciating. i don't know where did it come from but it's there.i cried a river but i don't know if it can turn back time.
i wish i can. i wish i didn't ask. for two weeks and then what? 
moving on is a hard part.can i? i thought i can but i don't know now.
i thought i'm tough but i think i'm not. 
it's time again to wear mask. to hide the pain i felt inside.. and pretend that everything is alright.

maybe yes, it takes time to heal all wounds..
i just hope the wound would not leave a scar.

it takes two to tango but why put blame only at one?
unfair? i don't know.. i think so..

i hope time changes everything..
can't help my self from hoping..

it hurts! it's like lost half of me..

welcome back hwang2..

2009-01-13T21:39:00.000-08:00

i was sleeping soundly last night when i heard some noise..i know it's a cats voice but i can't figure out which of them..
i knew i closed the door,but maybe either rara or kibo were so smart to open it...
but to my surprise it wasn't them...
it's hwang2!!!
OMG!
i was so happy to see him..
his back!! he found his way home..
now i have 4 cats again..
i hope daesoh, bluey,pipay and mal2 know the way to our house..

hwang2 lose some weight--of course what do you expect to eat outside the house,nothing but leftovers from trashcans-- he always follow me .
wants to sleep and sit beside me..
he knows i'm his protector..
lala (my demon-as begi said) was a little bit jealous.
i gave extra care and attention to whang2..lala is so me...maybe she is really my demon..hehehhe
me in a cats body..mwehehhe
today i bought inihaw n bangus..
i know he likes it..
i will buy cat food in can tomorrow..
i know hwang needs nutritous food to regain his weight and health.. i bathe him today coz he's so dirty..
parang naligo ng alikabok..
but i'm happy his back...
welcome home hwang2... ate loves u much..

happy new year..

2009-01-01T21:45:00.000-08:00

it's a new year..new trials,new challenges,new frustrations new OPPORTUNITES..

wondering what's in store for me this 2009...

i just hope lieslie will pay..it's 65tw.. and it's my parents money..grrr.. kabalan gd y ang linte ya!

erase..erase..erase... i was trying not to think bout it..it just ruin my day..

anyway right now i am downloading cherie's fave songs for her new cp..

i woke up early today.. don't know why.. it was too early and i can't think of something to do.. i'm

the laziest person in the house.. as my brother DOn2 said 'i'm the sick princess" hehehe
miss my family and my dogs in the province..haaayyyy..

i bathe KIBO and RARA today.. they are my two kittens.. they were crying and trying to escape..but sorry attempt were not successful...hehhehe

i think this month will be a rainy season..it's dark outside..just hope it will not rain.. i hate to travel off to work while it's raining..it's cold inside the bus.. i don't have enough fats to cover me..

i wish i wil gain wieght this year.. i wish..
and i hope i will have good calls later..

almost there...

2008-12-28T20:07:00.000-08:00

well, i passed the read out. i got the lowest aht running..still i'm sad..KRIS didn't report anymore..i dont know why but i miss here.. i want her to be there..KRIS is made for call center..sayang..i want to txt her but nhhiya me coz i wasn't able to attend to her daughter's christening.. kris i miss you..paramdam ka nmn..

RD

2008-12-09T11:16:00.000-08:00

today is my rd..
but not so happy coz i have split day off..
it's like i only sleep for a night..
i slept the whole day eu and i was planning to watch movie after his rehearsal..
but sorry i over slept.
.hehehhe i will just watch tomorrow..
alone..
hehhehe
i will buy large size of drinks and a popcorn..
hehhheh

window shopping..

2008-11-29T20:37:00.000-08:00

yesterday i went out w/ my good friends again-- Cherie, fernand, jp and lani.. we ate at chowking..
suppossed to be we were going home.. but jp was still lazy to go home (don't know why.hehe) well since it was my rd ans also cherie's.. *pinagbigyan nmin c Bejar* we went to glorrietta.. and to jp's disaapointment--we walked from sykes to glorrietta..hahhaha an lau kaya.. at ang bejar ng rereklamo n n malayo..so, i always reminded hin n its his gusto...mwehehhehe bought zagu..window shop..we went to landmark.. i bought my liquid foundation.. cherie was about to buy a gift but she cant choose what to buy..so ending la rin xa nbili..hehhehe i took a bus home..
wen i arrived home.. i felt too tired..i put eficascent oil on my legs...sumasakit eh..hehhee sign of old age..mwehehhehe
but anyway i enjoyed!!! too bad i didn't bring my DiCa..sana picture galore ulit...next tym!!!

HEARTBREAKING

2008-11-29T10:20:00.000-08:00

a minute ago i watched a video from yahoo headline news.. it was about a lion who being rescued by wonderful people who has a big heart for animals... it made me cry.. i miss POTPOT, BLUE AND DAESOH-- i don't know where are they now. i just hope they will come home soon.. i know they're very hungry and i don't know if they are thirsty or cold or what.. while writing this i cant stop my tears from falling.. oh God please guide my 3 cats to come home.. i miss them.. i'm very worried about them..they were spoiled brats and they like tho sleep on comfortable chair or blanket.. i miss bluey's voice everytime he makes "lambing" i miss daesoh 'coz everytime i arrived from work he's the one who will first approached me ang sat on my bag--it's like he's saying --**i'm ate's favorite..

actually the video was taken many years ago....it was 1969 when Jonh Rendall and Ace Berg saw a lion cub for sale in Harrods.. they bought it and decided to bring it home. a local vicar allowed them to raise the cub. they named him Christian.they had the video where they were playing with Christian. it's wondeful to watch--that's why i felt pain in my chest-- but christian grew so fast and his too big for their flat.. a year later they decided to let go Christian and introduced him to where he really belongs--in the wild. they brought him to Africa.
they missed Christian much.they decided to visit him but they were being told that its too risky-- he's very big and he even the leader of his own PRIDE. But, undaunted John and ace took the risk. They went to Africa.

Ater an hour of waiting they spotted Christian--they waited for him to saw them--and thid is the highlight of the vid-- when Christian saw he recognized them!! he was running fast and hug them!! he still never forgets!!! this really makes me cry hard..until now. he kissed and hugged John and ace. you can really see on his face that he was very happy.. he looks like kid who was away from home for a long time and suddenly saw his parents... He even intriduced his wife to them. he didn't lo0k scary. he looked tame.. i like Christian.i love him

LOVE KNOWS NO LIMIT.FRIENDSHIP LAST A LIFETIME..

i love this vid.. makes me cry..makes me love my cats more...and more...

--Potpot-- wherever you are, i know you already crossed over the rainbow, don't forget me..ate really really loves you. and until now i still miss. i know you have to go away because i know that you knew it was your time to cross over the rainbow. but i just wish i saw you crossing it. i want to be there. T_T

--Bluey and Daesoh-- please come home. i'm worried. i hate errol much. i'm sorry i wasn't there to protect you.i had a shift. i wish i was there. please come home..i'mwaiting..i'm very worried maybe other stray cats bullied you n and i know you two are very hungry n.. please come home..i'm waiting...

just holding on..

2008-11-19T19:05:00.000-08:00

it's my RD today.thank GOD! i feel weak today.. emotionally, physically and mentally. i'm not happy with what i am doing..its just that i dont have a choice- as of now. if i quit i will receive a lot of questions and judgment.
i wish it will be over.. i tried to conquer this feeling but it wont stop..
i miss my batch mate. i miss our bonding. its totally different.
i don't like plastic people. inside, there's a lot of them. i don't like them. i don't like them. but i have no choice but to deal with them.
my wednesday shift was okay. the mood was lighter. i wish all my shift will be like that. i wish most of them will be in RD- always.. i don't like them. i don't like them.

i know this job is not my forte.. this is not for me... i can feel it... but for now i have to stick with it whether i like it or not.
if i found another, without a blink of an eye i will quit.

haaayyyyy.. npapagod n ako!!! i felt deprived from life....!

picture galore..!!

2008-11-15T00:48:00.000-08:00

it's nice to have wonderful friends...!!!

2008-11-15T00:37:00.000-08:00

today after our shift fernand,cherie,jp and i went out to eat lunch.. there wasn't a plan though--it was an on the spot plan..it was BEJAR's idea..and funny thing was we don't have money--only cherie had.. it was cherie who paid our bill and later we will going to pay her..heheheh we ate at Max's resto..the food was simple but yet we really enjoy!! i felt like i was energized.. it's nice to have wonderful friends and its nice that we went out again..haayy nkk miss talaga..well, next time again..i hope lani can join na..
we took pics using my cp and here are our shots..mwehehhehe

2nd day in production..

2008-11-12T00:53:00.000-08:00

earlier it was my 2nd day inside the production. my TM was on RD,JP was absent..yesterday 3 of us were absent. kris had an emergency at home, JP was-- i don't know--didn't even txtd me or kris..

today i got a lot of help from my teammates.. i felt stupid.. i think.. i felt like i am the weakest link among the 3 of us.. i am still learning.. there were still some issues and questions that were new to me and i had the hard time explaining it to CH's..

my teamates were there to the rescue..but i still feel stupid... i kept asking why during our CAP those questions weren't asked? hell!!!

i was monitored today by our QA--she's pretty and nice--1st call passed 2nd call i had info anec..but it wasn't hard anec coz i only missed the 2nd bullet of disclosure.. i think i was relieved when i found out that most of our team,plus our TM was on RD-- i hope everyday she's on RD..kkkk bad me..

tomorrow is my RD til friday..yeheeyyy!! i have so much time to sleep..
i have negative feelings hovering me right now..i'm trying to ignore it.. my only motivation is --xmas!!! i don't want to be a beggar wen xmas comes...
i'm trying myself to hold on still..hold on.. then if it's time to let go..then let go... i am not happy with it anymore..i know why..but i can't tell pat about it..if i will.. they will hate me 4ever--- i will be their living example for newbies... bad example...mweheheh they will regret i was part of the team..

not now..but i know soon...

NOVEMBER 10-- MYD AY

2008-11-11T05:18:00.000-08:00

yes, it was my birthday but, it wasn't a good birthday. i was sick, until now i still feel dizzy. i was absent too..2nd day in prod and i was absent. what a good start,huh!? i don't care if it would affect my stat or whatever my TM or my team members might think. i don't care!!

i was sick and i won't pressure myself.

i had a checkup today. DR. Pamaran prescribed a vitamins for me. she said i was the only thin csr agent she'd met..hehehe so i ask her for a vitamins--the n she wrote something which i can barely understand..hehehe

i will go to work today. i don't want to, but i have to. haayyyy...

i don't like this life.. i miss the training room.. i miss my wave mates,my friends and patrick... inside the training room isn't as heavy as inside the production..
and what i don't like is-- they taught us something-- 'something' that patrick did'nt want us to do. i don't want to do it because i know it's cheating.what will i do? what if i was monitored? how can i reason out? i don't like it.

the best thing i learned when i was in dance troupe is -- honesty. if you want to achieve something that feels good inside and be proud of it--DO IT IN A CLEAN and CORRECT WAY..

haayyyyy... how long will i last?

until december? i don't know.. im not excited anymore--- n turn-off ako..i was kind a dissapointed....

NOVEMBER 09 2008

2008-11-11T05:06:00.000-08:00

it was supposed to be a happy day. but things turned out to be the other way. i was endorsed-(i should feel happy but i wasn't). it was my first day in production. my TM is scary. she's very strict when it comes to stats. i don't know if i can reach her metrics in the long run.. if i can't- well i have other options running inside my mind.
haayyyy... jaypee and kris did good- i think...i'm the FISH in this field-- technically speaking. it's my first call center job.. haay negative feelings covered my system right now.. but there's no turning back. xmas is approaching..
i was wodering how was cherie and lani.. i miss them... i miss them.. fernand is just a few steps away.. i can see him.. and i think his doing well too... haaaayyy..
i don't like it anymore... my teamates were very helpful during our first day.. i don't know in the long the run they will still be the same..
haaayyyy...

i'm too tired..

2008-11-07T00:51:00.000-08:00

i don't know how long i can take it anymore. it's like anytime i will just quit!! i'm too pressured.too tired.. i felt like i'm getting thinner and thinner...%^$#@)# sh**!

i'm really thankful that HONEY is with us..and our new QA robert--i learned something from him--the credit steps (w/c i also shared with my friends and waivemates) i passed the other metrics. i'm just waiting for my sales rate and sales attempt.. i'm not excited to be endorse.. i want to quit..quit..quit..quit.. sam did... but... xmas is coming..i don't want to be broke on xmas day.. maybe my life at sykes is until december only---if i can.. i was dissapionted with one of our L2's. she's BOBO..i wonder how she became an L2. soooo incompetent..G_G_!!!
haayyyy sorry GOD i'm bad...
i'm planning to be absent today but cherie texted me not to.and i gave my word.so i have to fullfill it. i like my new friends at sykes-only my friends not sykes.clear?
sleep now,,nytnyt

OMG..i'm so nervous..

2008-11-03T01:29:00.000-08:00

3.30 am later we will going to take calls all the time. no more PELET,briefing and de-briefing..and these calls will be monitor by our new QA..judgement day will be on saturday...haay ntatakot n ako..i felt like i'm not ready yet.....QUE SERA SERA.........

a relaxing and funny bonding..

2008-11-02T01:16:00.000-07:00

i was stressed out and tired yesterday during our shift..i had bad calls..=( but..all of it vanished when we arrived at laguna..
yes, we had an out of town-not so prepared--escapade..hehhe but it was fun..
after our shift we headed to the bus stop where lani and fernand usually wait for the bus..it was a long walk--good thing it wasn't a hot afternoon... the bus was not air conditioned, but it was okie..we had fun during the ride..fernand really really really had an active listening..he heard the vendor calling lani "mrs."kkk.. lani and fernand were like cats and dogs during the ride..mwehehhe..i cant' stop myself laughing...heheheh
the view was beautiful...after a year it was my 1st tym again to go out of town..
anyway the bus driver was irritating..he stopped at alabang for a long time..we were all sleepy at that time but we can't sleep.. i don't want to sleep either--i want to see the view..?hehe
we arrived at laguna with no plan on where we were going to stay..we ended up at grand bay resort--it was cheap--and our room's name is england..mwahahahha
it was a small room but we fit in..hehehhe jaypee and fernand slept on the--how'd you call that?-the pull over lower bed--whatever! lani,cherie and i slept together--buti kumasya kmi..hehehe..
we swam for just an hour or two..it was fun because it was only jaypee who can swim!!! OMG c fernand k laking tao di marunong lumangoy!! hahah kahit todo effort nd umaalis s lugar..mwahahhaha!!!
i tried the slide(actually we occupied the kids pool,only us during that time were swmming) 4x..it was fun..the second attempt--nkkatawa n ipit ang right leg ko s hawakan!hahah it was a bad fall..good thing only lani and cherie were there..we also played "habulan" mwahahahah madaya c lani umahon s tubig para maging taya c fernand..we had fun fun fun!!!! ang saya saya!!!
and the finale...jaypee,fernand and lani had a drinking session..lani and fernand got drunk!! aso't pusa uli..ang daldal nla..mwahahhaha!!!
and lani said the cieling was moving and she asked fernand to stop it from moving..and even blaming the resort for being cheap that's why it was moving...mwahahahahah db nkktawa? ang cute pala n lani malasing parang cheerleader..ang daldal..mwahahahhaha!!!
i will treasure this escapade..i was with my new found friend that i really like..sana may kasunod p ha..

P.S.
kris sorry talaga akala ko kc cnbhan ka n fernand kc secret nga lg ung outing..mwehehhehe...next tym promis i'll make sure n masasabihan ka n..sori po...

odd feeling..

2008-10-26T19:56:00.000-07:00

it's monday again....again..=( i felt like i don't have much rest..later tonight i have to leave the house at around 11pm--my sked is still 3.30am..haaayyy i will take calls again.
tinatamad n ako.. the will to do is slightly fading..the only thing that motivates me is the salary..kk
i have plans to save money.for my cats.i'm going to let them spayed and neuter before the year ends..after that.. i will resign..find another job or maybe go back to teaching..or take up supplementry course...QUE SERA SERA.....

done with the 1st week of CAP

2008-10-25T22:51:00.000-07:00

i don't know what i feel now..i'm not excited,not nervous and not fullfilled.
maybe, i was just disappointed about how things turned out the way i wasn't expected. (even though i didn't have SUP call for the last two days. )
a week before our CAP there were a lot of promises that made to be broken..
that's one thing that i hate-- if you promised,you have to fulfill it-ahh i hate people who can't fulfill their promise.
i know with regard to this training i'm still coping... there are lots of detail that are still blurr..
and one thing that annoys me--my ProphIt! it sucks!!! the hell..
i'm only good in CSAT..only that..but when it comes to product i'm still learning..(we're lucky that we have HONEY,she's very nice and very patient.she knows that we are still coping)and to hell with those stupid CH. they didn't even read the terms and conditions before they signed the contract..
i don't know how long i will last..i don't even care if i will be extended or not..it's like the excitement and inspiration was lost..haayyy i don't know...or maybe because i'm just tired and doesn't have a good sleep
QUE SERA SERA.........

what a beautiful shift..mwahahahahha

2008-10-17T16:29:00.000-07:00

OMG!!! i thought it was only me who had a crush ky A.M... i was so surprised to find out n madami kmi..heheh
haaayyyy ang gwapo talaga n A.M...heheheheh it's hard not to smile.... haaayyy till now nkkkilig p rin..mwhahahhahahaha!! and he smells good. he's married-but its okie crush lg nmn..

and.... i was really surprised p wen i found out that his cubicle is near on our area..whaaatttt!!!? i just hope (if ever i got endorsed) d ako mlalagay dun malapit s kanya.kc baka d me mkpgsalita dahil n ko-conscious..hehehhehe
as jaypee said ngdadalaga dw ako..mwahahahhahaha!!
crush lg nmn e..la nmn masama dun db..haayyyyy
nhulog talaga puso ko..mwahahahahahaha!!
i love this day!!!

1 hour and 30 minutes live phone calls...

2008-10-15T16:07:00.000-07:00

at 3:am earlier today I've experienced to talk to a real customer. it was nerve wracking and my hands were shaking even after i finished the call... it wasn't that disastrous- i think.. i only suck on my 2nd to the last call 'coz i didn't know how to handle the call.. the customer i was talking to suspected fraud on his account transaction.but he didn't want me to report a LSRp... he just wanted me to take the charges from his account..halleeerrr!!! what the hell! i can't do that of course! we have a task to follow... good thing kris was a great help..she helped me to get through to all my calls..
i can't really forget the voice of my first caller--mr. stein--ang gwapo ng boses..!!! hehehehe
and he was very friendly.... i wish all my future callers wud be like him.

i wish today we will not gonna do the live call again.. maybe i will die..hehehhe

some of my wavemates told me that i spoke loudly!! keber!! mwehehehehh.. i'm so nervous so i can't control it..sorry n lg muna...

heheheheheh

CAP is approaching...

2008-10-14T16:50:00.000-07:00

huhuhu..whether we like it or not--CAP is approaching... it would be next week...i'm nervous..huhuhu
earlier before after our last break we had mock calls.all of them got an error...good thing i wasn't called to do the task...maybe i will be like them too...fatal..hehehhe

we miss patrick-it's really different.. i miss his being articulate and giving lots of example (la kokontra,it's my opinion..hehehhe)

we have champions among our wave:
WBT CHAMPION-DAN
HOW-TO CHAMPION- MASTER JERIC
FAVORITES AND QA CHAMPION-ERIC

mwahahhahahah!!!!!
fernand said that he wouldn't be a champion. he will be a platinum agent...mwahahhaha!! good spirit nan! keep it up... pg ngyari yan p burger ka ha? hehehehhe

good start...

2008-10-13T15:50:00.000-07:00

just got home (as usual).. i like our first day of the week..we had fun..although the discussion some(most?) of it were blur...we got our phone log In ID..and fernand can't lo gin because his password was wrong..hahaha kokopya n ga lg mali p..wasted? mwahahhaa (luv yah!!)

kris and i miss patrick..it's really hard to adjust if you change from one mentor to another. you can't really avoid to set expectations and can't help comparing thier teaching technique (i know its unfair that's why i fought myself not to do that)hehehe

as usual the "give me the title of the song" game again...walang kamatayan....but it was fun... a good start of a week training... i hope our salary will be out soon..haaayyyy..

not yet sleepy but i have to take a bath na..para mk relax.... nytnyt!!!!

P.S.
that's my ELDEST cat potpot,when it comes to tenure and age..mwehehehe he's my first adopted cat..good thing he's still with us...he's been with us for more than 4years and i hope he will stay with us until he lost all of his teeth..(he doesn't have 6teehts-3upper,3lower )..cute..isn't it? heheheh

exhausting weekend...

2008-10-12T08:05:00.000-07:00

just got home 2pm this afternoon..lack of sleep and my legs are aching (hospitals elevator was very slow so i have no choice but to take the stairs).
after my shift last saturday i went home straight. i arrived late 'cause the jeepney that took was reprimanded by a police man...'coz he didn't follow the order to take the other route..(a typical pinoy driver-pasaway-lulusot kg mkklusot. )
Jowa ang i were very sleepy when the MRT arrived.....i i was home i was surprised when my brother told me that he will have a surgery that day. i thought he was just joking-but he wasn't.
he has a cyst (a small one) on his left singit (i don't know the term in english=D). it has to be remove so that he can be cleared on his medical.. 'coz he can't go to US and work if he has this.vry strict casino, huh..!
i was scared at first 'coz i dont like hospital's smell. it gave me goose bumps and operation? haalleer! i'm scrared to see blood. my mom and sister was undergone operation with that same symptom--CYST.. so maybe it really runs in the family...
i don't want to go but i have ni chioce, only me my brother and my aunt here in our house.if cat could nurse my brother i would send them all (hehehhe)
so without much ado i went to the hospital with my brother... he was under surgery at exactly 10am.. the hospital's service was very poor..grrrrr!!! it was really different in our hospital in NEGROS--nothing can beat SAINT JOSEPH HOSPITAL when it comes to facilities,cleanliness ans service....
i was the one who bought my brother' need--medicine,food(hospital's food i think is dirty 'coz it looks dirty.hehheh) and other needs.. sometimes the ,medicine was not available at the pharmacy so i have to go out and look for a nearest MERCURY DRUGSTORE..
i don't want to go back to that hospital anymore...i was dissapointed with the service--i don't trust the people there--i felt they're incompetent (the staffs)..
now my brother is sleeping,he just took his pain reliver an hour ago....
but all in all i thank GOD that th esurgery wen tsmoothly and my bro is okay now..
time to chek my friendster...
haaayyy..good thing it's my RD....

it's friday!!!

2008-10-09T16:09:00.000-07:00

yes!!! it's Friday again... wheeewwwh!!! tomorrow will be our RD..i like....mwehehehhe..

update 'bout prod training...:
well, we had fun (for me.hehhe) JP,cherrie,fernand and i...both guys were teasing cherrie--good thing she isn't a "pikon" type..hehhehe... even during our WBT were teaching each other and funny thing was--- sometimes it was a wrong answer...JP got 100 (for the 3rd attempt).. madAya...heheh

it will be our last day with patrick 'coz he will have a 1 week vacation. madel will take over and our boys are all excited..hmmmmm... i hope she's nice and well equipped...

then 3rd week of this month we will have our calls...(scared at the same time excited)

haaayyyy.. i hope i can handle the calls rightly so that i won't be extended during our CAP and can graduate together with my batch mate....

nytnyt now..sleepy n.....

P.S.
that's my adopted dog NISKI.he's been with the family for 7 years(province house). He was maltreated and abandoned by his former owner. i took pity on him coz he was so skinny and scared at people. It took time (more than a month) for him to conquer that fear. We showed him love and acceptance.My family made him feel that he belongs, even though that time we have 3 dogs at home(i was his defender)... now Niski is very healhty. he's complete with all the vaccines and he's neutered.He's a very sweet dog. I remembered wen i was angry i talked to him,and while i'm talking he was really paying attention as if he knows wat i'm talking about.hehehe miss u "mama ni!"

after yosi break...

2008-10-07T16:11:00.000-07:00

kris...jeric... en i.. during our 1st break.. la mgawa s taas ei..

2008-10-07T15:56:00.000-07:00

i arrived home earlier today compared yesterday... being at work was full of fun..although some topics caused me nose bleed..hehehe we had our mock call today ang i paired up again w/ L.A. and eric..i think L.A. was a little bit dissapointed with his earlier mock call (which u had to go in front and do the thing.He wasn't able to pulled up the correct info on the account). It affected his performance during our group mock call, it's like his thoughts was disorganized.. thanks to eric he really knew almost of it. He guided me through it..it was fun though..

during our breaks cherrie, fernend and jaypee were having their favorite past time--- guessing the title of the song.. i think they have videoke machine in their houses (they're just embarrased to admit it..mwehehhehe wat a thought!).

next week will be our final week for product training..huhuhu we will be having live calls.. i'm nervous...huhuhu...

i'm sleepy now. no special event happened when i was on my way home..=)

P.S.

that's my cat lala and nognog.

a bad day..

2008-10-06T08:48:00.000-07:00

after our shift we decided to send our log records to HRIs, but gosh!! the computer sucks! it really tested my patience..i want to bang the computer on the wall.. it was so slow.. it took my 1 and a half hour but then i wasn't able to navigate on it..duh!!!! halleeerrr!!! can't the company provide a good computer to access on our log records and log modification? it really pissed me off...
then wen i arrived home i saw the person i want to kill (so angry kc at him). ang kapal ng mukha!! sarap sunugin ang p%$#@***** bading n 2! wen are u going to evaporate and out of mu sight forever and ever..! i'm so mean to people i don't like (those that done somehting that i really really hate). i don't forgive them.i despise them for life. i know it's not good, but this is me. ruin me once and i ruin yu forever.
i think today is my bad day too. i checked my friendster account and i saw that she (the person who owes me 65tw) updated her friendster! but hte bitch didn't even care to reply on my msgs. it's been a month since i haven't heard from her.she promised to pay me in partial. but she didn't do it.ang kapal talaga ng mukha!
haaayyyy.. in this world there are lots of people na makakapal talaga ang mukha! in illionggo " my mga linte gd nga tawo s kalibutan nga mga kabalan kg wala huya!! karmahon mn kamu japon.!!!
goodthing i have my cats with me to appease my anger....
time to sleep now...hmmm..
FYI-- while i was writing this post my cat daesoh was sleeping on the table where i put my laptop.he's sleeping in front of it. so i had the hard time typing.
on the picture is my cat BLUEY(orange), daesoh (bro's computer) and whang-whang

pipay gave birth to a litter of kittens..

2008-10-05T08:48:00.000-07:00

before i served their dinner my cat pipay gave birth,so another 2 additional extended family (as my brother referred to my cats)... i was surprised at first because i didn't know that she was on labor.. i was only surprise when she got out from the box carrying a fragile,newly born kitten.. i shouted at first,because i thought it was a mouse she was carrying..after a split of second i realized it was a kitten...i waited (i expected more than 3),but i was happy wen after the 2nd she stopped. i bought her a milk (bear brand) beacause i know she will need it 'coz she's nursing 2 kittens.. the kittens are too tiny and the color is black--as of now... but i;m sure after a day or two i will really see the real color of my two new babies... anyway, i cooked fried chicken for dinner..hehhehe atlast i did it..but i'm not sure if the taste was right..kkkkk jalga!!!!!

P.S.
it's PIPAY my cat...

i hate you..

2008-09-27T09:29:00.001-07:00

liar...!!!!

i made it!!!

2008-09-27T09:02:00.000-07:00

hahahaha!! after 3 attempts i made it!!! i did!!! i have a blog now..hahahah
thanx to fernand-- (you're my blog inspiration..kk )
now i can write my experiences everyday after work...
nytnyt..